The Plight of an Open Heart
Actual footage of me shedding old conditioning patterns and running towards the light!!
In Human Design, about 63% of the population has what is called an “open heart.” The Heart Centre is the triangle near the middle of your chart, and if it is white instead of coloured in, it is considered to be open, undefined, and vulnerable to conditioning.
The Heart Centre of the chart is circled above
Not only do I have an open Heart Centre in my chart, I have what is called a COMPLETELY open heart, when it is undefined and there are no gates activated within the centre.
A completely open Heart Centre is shown above, with no activated gates
This means that I am especially vulnerable to conditioning in this area. This area that represents the ego, willpower, and the need to prove oneself. In other words, I have absolutely no concept of what it means to prove myself. Functioning as my optimal self, in total alignment with my true nature, I am meant to flow through life without worrying about proving anything.
For the majority of my life, I have not been living this way. Through picking up conditioning from certain family members and society as a whole, I have found a very wide array of ways to prove to myself and the world that I am worthy. These methods have been almost entirely condoned by society. I have been celebrated time and time again for the accomplishments I achieved where my only driving force was a compulsive need for approval and validation. It is a very uncomfortable pattern to examine, and I feel both sadness and anger as I become honest with myself about the many ways I have betrayed my true self through this compulsion to prove worth.
To overcome this has taken a willingness to be brutally honest with myself, and to take a big step back from everything I was using to prove that I am a worthwhile human being. It took a return to both my humanness and the inherent imperfection of that, and my being-ness to appreciate that I already have everything that I need – that I am already “enough.” Society in general does not support this. We are told that our being-ness is not enough – that me must do, strive, and achieve in order to taste the sweetness of life. This is a giant lie, and one that I believe we as a collective will be working to debunk in the coming years and decades.
In case no one has told you this lately, whether your Heart Centre is defined or undefined (although if it is undefined, chances are more likely that you will REALLY need to hear this): You. Are. Enough. You are a gift to this Earth and your worthiness is inherent. Your worth does not change with achievement, success, accomplishments, or anything you do. Worthiness is your birthright, and you truly deserve every single thing your heart and soul desire. Period.
On my end, I know this is a lesson I will return to time and time again. That I will have to constantly keep checking in with my Self through asking the questions: “Would I be doing this if there was nothing to prove?” or “Am I trying to prove anything in this situation?” If the answer is “yes” in either case, I know I need to stop and course correct.
For the moment, I am so excited to see what I can be, do, and create from a place of wholeness – from the spirit/soul rather than a distorted ego. What would it be like to run a race without letting my self-worth rest on the result? What would it be like to create a piece of writing from the heart, without worrying whether a professor will give it an A+? What would it be like to play the piano without worrying about hitting a wrong note? To enter into equal friendships and partnerships and business opportunities where I do not need validation from others because I have already validated myself on such a deep level?
I can’t wait to find out.